Skip to main content

Pride and Prejudice

It is a notion universally believed, that a single woman in possession of good looks, must be in want of a husband....Okay, okay, so maybe my statement is not true...I lifted it from Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice. But people in Christendom tend to feel this way.

If I tell you how many times I've heard "Oh Josie, you're so pretty and smart. How is it that you're still single?", you would have a stroke. I also get this a lot: "I'm praying that God sends the right man for you Sis. Josie because I can't stand to see you by yourself." It used to hurt my feelings. I used to think that there was something wrong with me because I had reached my 30s still single without any prospects of a husband. I felt like a social failure. Hang my degrees, my brains and my looks! What good are they without a Mr. Josie?!

I never told anyone, though, except the closest of my closest friends. I didn't want to be that girl. My friends, God bless them, always gave me the Stuart Smiley words of encouragement (you know, "You're good enough, you're smart enough and gosh darn it people like you!"). They meant well, but the encouragement didn't help.

Those not so close friends were worse, though. I got some of the worst advice I have ever been given. Someone even told me that my standards for a husband are too high and that's why I can't find anyone. She told me that wanting to marry a strong Christian man was being too picky and that if I didn't relax my standards, I would end up alone with a dozen cats. Just find a good, God-fearing man, she counseled. He doesn't need to be a Bible-believing Christian.

Can you imagine? My response is that I simply have too much Godly pride and I am too spiritually prejudiced to settle for less than what I want. I watched my father be the priest and spiritual leader of my home. Why would I want to marry a man that showed no signs of being able to live up to that?

I can truly say that I have gotten to a place where the prospect of living a single life doesn't bother me. I am living my life for Christ. A husband would be great. Children would be phenomenal, but being wholly committed to Christ without distraction? There's nothing better than that.

I encourage my single Christian sisters to be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. I encourage you to live God's purpose for your life, to refuse to let society dictate to you what you ought to be. Only God  can tell us what we ought to be or how we ought to live.

Do I get lonely? Absolutely! I'm not a robot. But my Lord is always with me.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Ride or Die

I love this phrase. There are quite a few subtle variations on the meaning, but it is an urban colloquialism that means loyalty, no matter what. I thank God that I have been blessed with a few people that have that kind of loyalty to me and I to them. It's a rich blessing that have true friends. They are with me and in my corner no matter what (or "regardless of what" as one of them would say). This week we had Vacation Bible School at my church and I was privileged to be a teacher. The first lesson was taken from Daniel chapter three. The very well known story of the three Hebrew boys: Shadrach, Meschach and Abednego. It is a wonderful story of faith, but something jumped out at me so profoundly that it almost knocked me over. We always focus on the deliverance. But the Hebrew boys did not. Their focus was on God and Him alone. They were ride or die for the Lord. Literally. If you read the story, they never once pray for deliverance. They talk about God's a
2 comments
Read more

Rocks, Gravel, Sand and Water

Let me first start by saying that I cannot take credit for the following example, as I did not originate it. In fact, I was listening to Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah and I was so touched by what he shared that I thought I would share it with all of you. Let's say I have a large, empty 5-gallon jar. If I place fist sized rocks into the jar until no more can fit, is it full? Before you answer, let me say that after I place the rocks in the jar, I pick up a bag of gravel and begin to pour that into the jar. Where does the gravel go? In between the spaces left by the rocks. After I fill the jar to the brim with gravel, is it full? Before you answer, consider this: I pour a bag of sand into the jar. Where does the sand go? Into the spaces left by the gravel, of course. After filling the jar to the brim with sand, is it full? Before you answer, consider this: I pour a pitcher of water into the same jar. Where does the water go? Into the spaces between the grains of sa
2 comments
Read more

Simple Mathematics

If you're like me, you're probably thinking there is no such thing as "simple" mathematics... and the picture above does not help! For some of us, even the simplest calculations require technological assistance. But don't lose heart, loved one! The equation I am about to give you is so simple even a pre-school student can understand it (I think!). So here it is, in the form of an "if/then" statement: If a=b, then b=a Simple, right? Of course it is because it is logical. The equal sign ("=") means that whatever is on either side of that sign is the same. So even if you reverse the order in which you list the items on either side of that equal sign, they are still equal. So then, how does this simple premise, simple equation apply to this inconvenient Christian journey. Here it is: Christian = Christ follower, Christ follower = Christian.  Again, simple, no? Or is it? It seems to me that we as Christians do not always act like Christ
4 comments
Read more