An Inconvenient Christianity

Hello everyone! This is another deeply personal blog, but I think writing about my issues will lead to victory over them (can the church say amen?) So here goes... I have a little confession to make. I STRUGGLE with anxiety. It can be debilitating. If there is anyone that can make a mountain out of a mole hill, that person is me. This is a battle I have been fighting (and, unfortunately, losing) for a long time. At its worst, I have been unable to function normally. During one particularly horrible bout of anxiety about 10 years ago, I was standing outside of the courtroom, crying and unable to enter because I was so overcome by anxiety about a case I had. Almost every major setback in my life can be traced back to my inability to act because of my anxiety. Thanks be to God, I do not suffer from debilitating anxiety most days. Most days, I can overcome the little stressers and distressers in my life. That's how I have been functioning, until recently. Recently, I have been

Happy New Year!!! Right...I know. I am the worst. I should have at least said something during the first quarter of the year. I was busy? A poor excuse, poorly offered. My apologies. But let's get down to why I decided to drop a note. Today, while listening to NPR I heard a story about a German word fernweh .  It means to have a longing for far off places (usually somewhere an individual has never been). The coined English term is "farsickness." (A play on homesickness, I suppose.) As I listened to the segment, the host heard from various people about a deep internal longing to visit far away lands both real (like Scotland or New Zealand) and fictional (like Westeros and Middle Earth). I smiled because I identified with the folks in the latter category. What I wouldn't give to invade a Westerosi territory on horseback with my khalasar behind me.... I digress. The more I listened, however, the more I began to think about being farsick in a spiritual sense. Co