It is a notion universally believed, that a single woman in possession of good looks, must be in want of a husband....Okay, okay, so maybe my statement is not true...I lifted it from Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice. But people in Christendom tend to feel this way.
If I tell you how many times I've heard "Oh Josie, you're so pretty and smart. How is it that you're still single?", you would have a stroke. I also get this a lot: "I'm praying that God sends the right man for you Sis. Josie because I can't stand to see you by yourself." It used to hurt my feelings. I used to think that there was something wrong with me because I had reached my 30s still single without any prospects of a husband. I felt like a social failure. Hang my degrees, my brains and my looks! What good are they without a Mr. Josie?!
I never told anyone, though, except the closest of my closest friends. I didn't want to be that girl. My friends, God bless them, always gave me the Stuart Smiley words of encouragement (you know, "You're good enough, you're smart enough and gosh darn it people like you!"). They meant well, but the encouragement didn't help.
Those not so close friends were worse, though. I got some of the worst advice I have ever been given. Someone even told me that my standards for a husband are too high and that's why I can't find anyone. She told me that wanting to marry a strong Christian man was being too picky and that if I didn't relax my standards, I would end up alone with a dozen cats. Just find a good, God-fearing man, she counseled. He doesn't need to be a Bible-believing Christian.
Can you imagine? My response is that I simply have too much Godly pride and I am too spiritually prejudiced to settle for less than what I want. I watched my father be the priest and spiritual leader of my home. Why would I want to marry a man that showed no signs of being able to live up to that?
I can truly say that I have gotten to a place where the prospect of living a single life doesn't bother me. I am living my life for Christ. A husband would be great. Children would be phenomenal, but being wholly committed to Christ without distraction? There's nothing better than that.
I encourage my single Christian sisters to be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. I encourage you to live God's purpose for your life, to refuse to let society dictate to you what you ought to be. Only God can tell us what we ought to be or how we ought to live.
Do I get lonely? Absolutely! I'm not a robot. But my Lord is always with me.
If I tell you how many times I've heard "Oh Josie, you're so pretty and smart. How is it that you're still single?", you would have a stroke. I also get this a lot: "I'm praying that God sends the right man for you Sis. Josie because I can't stand to see you by yourself." It used to hurt my feelings. I used to think that there was something wrong with me because I had reached my 30s still single without any prospects of a husband. I felt like a social failure. Hang my degrees, my brains and my looks! What good are they without a Mr. Josie?!
I never told anyone, though, except the closest of my closest friends. I didn't want to be that girl. My friends, God bless them, always gave me the Stuart Smiley words of encouragement (you know, "You're good enough, you're smart enough and gosh darn it people like you!"). They meant well, but the encouragement didn't help.
Those not so close friends were worse, though. I got some of the worst advice I have ever been given. Someone even told me that my standards for a husband are too high and that's why I can't find anyone. She told me that wanting to marry a strong Christian man was being too picky and that if I didn't relax my standards, I would end up alone with a dozen cats. Just find a good, God-fearing man, she counseled. He doesn't need to be a Bible-believing Christian.
Can you imagine? My response is that I simply have too much Godly pride and I am too spiritually prejudiced to settle for less than what I want. I watched my father be the priest and spiritual leader of my home. Why would I want to marry a man that showed no signs of being able to live up to that?
I can truly say that I have gotten to a place where the prospect of living a single life doesn't bother me. I am living my life for Christ. A husband would be great. Children would be phenomenal, but being wholly committed to Christ without distraction? There's nothing better than that.
I encourage my single Christian sisters to be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. I encourage you to live God's purpose for your life, to refuse to let society dictate to you what you ought to be. Only God can tell us what we ought to be or how we ought to live.
Do I get lonely? Absolutely! I'm not a robot. But my Lord is always with me.
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